"The Hallucinated Self"

   ... To the left, inside the entranceway, I saw the kitchen with the refrigerator and sink, and to the far right, the open bedroom door. Between where I stood and the bedroom was the door to the bathroom.

 

    Two steps inside the apartment door allowed me to hear the water from the bathroom sink run down the drain from the cold-water faucet, barely more than a drip. It ran over the broken green bottle of Aqua di Silva cologne. The broken green glass made me think that Ted had cut himself, but there was no sign of blood anywhere. I heard what I at first thought was a distant voice shout, “Ted” and I turned around to discover that that had been my voice. Part of me stood separated from that moment. My own voice had startled me.

 

    I heard my feet racing down the steps to the street. My right hand had automatically turned off the cold-water faucet. My voice trailed behind me. Fear separated, fear dissected. "Ted" was now an echo in my head. Fear controlled....

 

 

from All Drinking Aside (Rough Draft, Day 13)