The End of Chapter 21

　　 Emotions induced by alcohol, unbridled emotions. Emotions twisted. Unforeseeable results. Lashing out with nerves exposed. Harmful emotions, hurt emotions. All this life perverted by alcoholism's insanity. Immediate gratification (never quite gratified), prolonged pain (immediate, delayed, prolonged).

　　 This is a shopping list of things I did not want or need yet could not know because all I knew was being in the throes of my disease.

　　 Let this be my last good-bye to my last last drink.

　　 The last one was, finally, enough.
“The heart cannot worship what the mind rejects."

                             Bishop John Shelby Spong

　 How can I best bring balance to my life?  from All Drinking Aside (Rough Draft, Chapter 21)