Spoon River

   When I reached a fork in my road, the knife of addiction chose for me. I know that must sound like an excuse to a non-addict 'normie' but initially, eventually, the power of choice is removed and responsibility for my sobriety wasn't learned until after several relapses. The stigma and shame of admitting my alcoholism kept me 'out there' before I got sober and the shame of relapse keeps many (but didn't keep me) from returning to the rooms of recovery they need to regain a stronger foothold in sobriety. Relapse for me was a baby learning to walk. Falling was learning to walk. Relapse was part of learning to live sober.

from All Drinking Aside (Rough Draft, Chapter 23)