Tuesday, July 17, 2012

If I had been a whale...

If I had been a whale, would I have been a drunk whale? What kind of crazy life was I living? A whale leads a whale's life. Was this a human's life I was leading? This life I led was absolutely insane. A diseased life. A drunken life.
All humanity must certainly scream out against it.
But not my brain. Even at its worst, or perhaps even more so at its worst, all my brain wanted was another drink. A drink to kill the pain caused by drinking. Insane.
Turn it over.
(Sotto): Jim reminds me of one of those paddles with the string and ball attached. Or the stick with the cup attached, again with the string and ball. 
His attention is diverted easily. Not attention deficit disorder. Just attention diversion. He is a precocious child whose alcoholism never let him grow up. He's a sixty something, just now sober enough to grow up.
 
from All Drinking Aside (Rough Draft, Chapter 57)

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