Thursday, July 26, 2012

Chapter 67 ("Monkey Frocks") begins...


“Alcoholism isn't a spectator sport. Eventually the whole family gets to play.” - Joyce Rebeta-Burditt
Sobriety is a gift. Recovery is earned.
Rehab and Recovery and Relapse and Rehab and Recovery. I’ve been in several Detoxes and Rehabs and Programs and Group Therapies- several times each. My second time in the Institute for Human Development (which is now the John Brooks Recovery Center) I was in a Librium fog, supine on my cot, listening to the two guys two cots down talking quietly with each other about their addiction to heroin.
They talked about how they would not have a problem with the heroin if they had the fame and money of rock stars. They professed that they didn’t need the right people, places and things for their recovery because they really believed that with the right people, places and things, they wouldn’t have a problem with their heroin.
There was a time when I had a false sense of the superiority of alcoholism over other addictions, and this false sense helped allow me to continue with abandon.
“Oh, the Humanity,” the announcer exclaimed as the Hindenburg went up in flames. “Oh, the Insanity…” of any and all addictions. Always wanting more and feeling empty, left out.
(Sotto): I feel like the priest in a confessional. He is talking, but I cannot hear the sin. The sin is inside of him. He is not the sin, he is its container and the sin is emptiness. Vatchi, this makes me feel sad. Alcoholism. His disease is emptiness.
 
 
from All Drinking Aside (Rough Draft, Chapter 67)

1 comment:

  1. Why did I think Recovery is a gift and sobriety earned? Whatever...the photo brings me to mind of my family at the dinner table.

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