Precarious at best....

　　 Some old-time drinking thoughts creep back into my head sometimes saying, "You deserve a drink." I have to pull the reins back on my wild horse impulses. If I lose these inhibitions, I will lose myself again. Death by reflex. Death by habit. Death by alcoholism.
　　 I will not drink today.

from All Drinking Aside (Rough Draft, Chapter 16)